How to Love Your Body Even When You Hate the Way It Looks
I was speaking with one of my wonderful and beautiful clients about all her body has been through. Between childhood abuse, chronic illness, fertility treatments, multiple children and a life-long eating disorder- her body has been through a lot.
I was sitting there in total awe of her, thinking how damn strong she was and how amazing it was that she was still alive.
I was overcome with this love and gratitude for her body, for the fact that it had carried her for so long and continued to stay alive and keep her here on this earth. I just wanted to hug her for hours and tell her body that I loved it so much for keeping her alive and for letting us keep such a beautiful person on this earth.
And then, I began to wonder if she ever felt that way about her body, if she ever told her body that she loved it. So I gave her the assignment to tell her body that she loved it every day for a week. And then I gave the assignment to my eating disorder group, and then I gave the assignment to myself, and now I’m giving it to you.
But HOW Can You Love Your Body When You Hate the Way It Looks?
Healing body image isn’t as simple as standing in front of a mirror and telling your body that it’s beautiful and that you love it. You will never feel okay doing that because you just won’t believe it. But what about telling your body that you love it the way you would one of your children or one of your pets, or someone else you loved? Would you all of a sudden stop loving your child or your pet because they gained weight?
It’s not about loving the way your body looks, it’s about loving your body in a way that is more pure way, like this:
“I love you because we’ve been together our whole lives. I love you because you have kept me alive. I love you because even though I’ve abused you, and been angry at you and said horrible things to you, you keep me alive. You stay with me. I beat you down, I abuse you, I say mean things to you. God, you don’t deserve that. You have carried me. You have kept me alive and for that I love you. I know that I don’t love your size or your shape or certain things about you. I know that I don’t even like you very much. And I know that sometimes I even hate the way you look. But that’s on me, not on you. That’s on society, not on you. YOU are amazing. I’m sorry for the things that I’ve said, I’m sorry for the way I’ve treated you, I’m sorry for the things I’ve said that made you feel bad. And I’m sorry that I’m probably going to all these things in the future. But please know for now that I love you.”
Try to tell your body that you love her once (or twice or 10 times) a day for a week or so and then, check in. You will be amazed at the difference it makes.
Related: How To Stop Hating Your Body
Related: Thunder Thighs and Other “Problem” Areas
Right now I’m loving the book Body Positive Power by Body PosiPanda (Megan Jane Crabbe)
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